Where I can be as awkward as I want
  • Dear Starbucks

    I’m sorry to generalize, but why do you suck so bad at making coffee?

    Your cappuccinos are wet and your lattes are foamy…get your shit together.

    Let your shots pull for the right amount of time and quit forcing your shitty weak-ass brew coffee on me, its the only thing worse that your cafe drinks.



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  • "Here’s the hug your dad never gave you."
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  • Guess I’m not going on the wharf today. Fuck.

  • How do you define the ocean?
    You can’t,
    Confine it into words.
    The limits of our language
    Are less than it deserves.

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  • This fucking fictional creature has a thigh gap and I don’t.

    (Source: zadiefox, via julee3ah)

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  • Bible Study

    • Me: Just curb-stomp the Jesus into him
    • Him: That's not what Jesus would do
    • Me: Not with those sandals
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